homecoming pt.2

i'm putting things into boxes
moving books and scraps of my life
that haven't see much light,
only steady piles of gathering dust.
time is moving through my mind
like nostalgia always does -

nostos
to return home
algos
to ache

and that's the point.

i'm putting things into boxes
moving away from this life and toward
another. when i come back,
it won't be to the same room
or even to the same space.
everything will have a different color and shape.

all filtered through different
lenses, my life churned over
in minds that are not my own.

title

and when i
laid my head down, i
found it hard to
quiet my busy
mind, lit-up like a
city at night.
i could not see past
my memory,
could not smell but
to search
for that scent. yet
above all else,
it was the pounding
rhythm her name
beat on my heart
with each
and ev'ry
breath i
took,
repeated through
my weary bones.

i was lost in two
syllables -
that was all it took
to spin my mind 'round
perfect words
and half-lidded eyes.
even as my mouth
formed the shapes
of letters, i
could taste
her on my lips,
feel her breath on
my neck.

and so it cycled
in my mind
like an
uncontrollable
tic.
a name.

title

to gain an attraction
and forget my passion
This is my greatest down fall
Perhaps-this roller coaster ride must
meet its end before I can
think to write again.
but its beginnings created such new inspiration.

I should be able to write on it
again and again until the writing
starts to look the same
and the poems become dull

when the fountain stops giving youth.