Drowned for the night

my heart stutters a bit every time the cool night air hits my face
you think I'd be used to it by now.
but here we are out in the excited night air
puffing away talking of the regrets we'll always have later,
of the regrets we are all too sure we'll never have

we talk about friends and life and family
mostly the things that we're not proud of
and couldn't help anyway
and sometimes there are pauses
where there's the troubled pattern of feet
because of the uneven slates of sidewalk
raised up by the protest of tree roots

I think the park looks questionable,
but who would attach two college kids trespassing and playing tetherball?
It's not long before I declare your unfair advantage of height
and the game becomes a thinking tool
as i watch. we're talking about commitment
oh, that again

the room isn't moving, that's just how the room
thinks it wants to move when it gets uncomfortable
from my staring,
but when you;re on your back and your eyes won't close
you don't have much choice so you look
and you talk

you say things, quietly at first and then more so
and then you feel the warmness and
sometimes the feeling dissipates
and then the cool night air hits your face again
and it all comes rushing back
and you're drowned,
drowned for the night.