Influence.

I Know I was under the influence,
but I said what I meant.

I mean, I already knew it was true,
but I'd never said it so directly.
So smoothly, fondly, solidly.

And I want to say it again,
but I won't.

it's so...confusing, frustrating, upsetting,
inconvenient, unfortunate.

I said it, yet I didn't say it at all.