belief

i am a fool for belief
and its sweet everythings.
i know the nearness of faith
when falling on what can
only be felt.

i believe in meanings,
am meant to have
meaning.
if i am alive to hear the cries
i am meant to stop them.

here in this suburb
meanings gave way to
less-than,
the relief of exorcising one's
demons
by declaring

they

don't

exist.

i've been fucked for believing
in meaning. i was told,
"it means nothing,"
and i believed that meant
something -
what
a holy fool i am for falling.

it has always been
those demons
who keep me strong.

now i pick up my scraped knees
my knotted knuckles
and still believe.